Dreams Delayed

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In the spring of ’03 I had just finished up the third year of my writing degree at Linfield College. My fellow students were planning their summer vacations, jobs, going home to a family. I was raising one. One morning my professor handed me a piece of paper with a circled ad.  It was for an […]

This Is My Land

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It was more than forty years ago that my in-laws, just after giving birth to their seventh child (my husband) purchased an acre of land. An escape, they said, from the L.A. life they found themselves living. Bud worked the assembly line at General Motors in Van Nuys, and Patricia worked in a medical office.  […]

This Blog Is Not Real

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Last night a young lady with a history much like my children’s wrote me a message and asked for advice.  But before she asked, she spent several paragraphs telling me why she wasn’t worthy of my time.  “…as if reading your blog somehow makes me worthy of placing myself in your life,” she said. As […]

SNOW DAY!

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Anderson Hill, near Ninilchik, Alaska… In celebration of our first completed week doing our schooling at home…and after all the kids were finished with their work…we hit the sledding hill down the road.  Billy built a jump…and it was all ‘downhill’ from there! Luke…has…no…nerve…endings. He bursts throug the jump…   Billy attempts snow boarding…   […]

Three Small Things

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Originally written in May, 2011…re-posting. A small brush fire near my home last night brought a trooper to my door saying to prepare for the worst…the wind was taking it our direction…be ready to leave without warning.  Warning. Wasn’t that what he just gave us? I went back into the house and gathered the children.  […]

The Shield Of Confidence

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  In 2004 I graduated with a 3.89 GPA from one of the highest rated private colleges on the west coast.  And I did so, while parenting eight children, six of whom had some kind of special need.  My final semester I managed 25 credits at two different colleges, picking up some missing credits at […]

Children Will Remember

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As parents, we spend our lives trying to be good enough.  Trying to keep up.  We worry that we’ve failed.  We worry that we’ve screwed up our kids to the point of no return because somehow we’ve not been good enough…as parents.  But let me explain something. Our children will not remember their childhood the […]

It’s The Little Things…

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It’s the little things that get to you. It’s the, “Not Me” that always gets blamed.  The Birds and the Bees that needs explained. It’s the cookies hidden beneath the bed.  The fifteen millionth book to be read. The science fair project that’s due tomorrow.  The hand held out, wanting to borrow. It’s the crusty, […]

I Cry In The Bathroom

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I write these sad stories about my kids…about their survival and their trials. About their successes.  And my readers cry out, “Good job, mom!”…or… “Where would they be without you?” And I’ll accept the compliments with one raised eyebrow as I think, “They did it despite my failures half the time…”  But I acknowledge my […]

A Letter To My Spouse

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I was thinking about us today.  Remembering those years when you had hair and I had a waistline.  Back when we sat, feet to feet on the couch, scheming our next adventure late into the night.  It was a time when it all seemed doable and barriers were more like speed bumps than impossibilities. When, […]